Franklyn (2008)

Franklyn (2008)

Written and Directed by Gerald McMorrow

            Due to the fact that this movie sucked, I’m gonna give you a brief synopsis sans spoilers and then just talk about shit that I feel like talking about, as I wouldn’t want to waste any more of your time with this movie than I have to.

            Franklyn was essentially about 4 people making their way through a day or two, or possibly more, in London.  To be honest, for the first ¾ of the flick, I had no clue what was going on.  Sam Riley (who was Award-worthy in Control, a biopic of Ian Curtis) played somebody who sulked and popped his collar.  I’m not really sure what his purpose was.  Eva Green (the naked chick from The Dreamers, also Bond’s love interest in Casino Royale) played a crazy chick who was presumably obsessed with a weird art form involving suicide.  She also played somebody else who may or may not have been imaginary.  Ryan Phillipe (former husband to uber-bitch Reese Witherspoon) played a superhero in Meanwhile City, a city built on religions.  Literally.  It was a very poignent, not-so-subtle metaphor for the world today.  And it looked a lot like the city from Dark City, a far superior sci-fi flick from which this one obviously got quite a bit of inspiration.  There’s a nice little twist in the last 5 minutes that ties everybody and everything together, but it’s really quite bad.  You’ll lose interest, just like I did, after about 10 minutes, because you have no idea what the fuck is going on.  I rented this because I recalled reading a quite favorable review, but this movie was just bad.  DO NOT SEE THIS.  You’ll waste an hour and 38 minutes of your life. So, on to better things.

·         Spiderman 4 – Yes, I saw the third one.  To be honest, I enjoyed it at the time, but then I got to thinking, and I realized it was terrible.  And from what I can recall, that was the general consensus at the time.  So why would Sam Raimi agree to do another one?  Maybe he wants to clear his name, but I think he did that with Drag Me to Hell.  I’m on the fence with this one.

·         Avatar – Listen, I was on the same ship as most people for the past year or two.  Hearing all the hype, but not seeing anything, I really didn’t give a shit.  Then I saw the first trailer, and I was stoked.  Then the second trailer was even better.  But now the trailers are on every five minutes on every channel, and I don’t give a shit again.  The visuals look awesome, but the story looks generic.  And from what I can gather, that sentence pretty much sums up all of the reviews coming out.

·         Sex and the City 2 – I’d be much happier if Sarah Jessica Parker would fall into a well.

·         Kevin Smith’s next movie, now possibly titled Cop Out – I love Kevin Smith.  I own and love all of his flicks, even Jersey Girl, which pretty much got shit on by everybody else.  I’m also a huge Bruce Willis fan.  Honestly, I can’t name a flick with Willis that I didn’t like.  From what I understand, Adam Brody and Olivia Wilde are in this as well.  Adam Brody was the only watchable part of The O.C.  Olivia Wilde is hot as hell.  But Tracey Morgan is also in this.  And Tracey Morgan is unwatchable in anything.  He’s an annoying racist who seems to make it a point to always play a retard in anything he’s in.  I’ll see this, but I’ll see it reluctantly.

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